Lose Yourself

We are in the middle of a big snow storm and my beloved little Hen House is tucked deep inside a winter barn covered up in snow.  I'm in my room, filled with so many warm summer memories that keep playing over and over in my mind's projector.  The "Hen House" holds the key to my life redefined. 

I'm proud of myself.  There, I said it. 

I had a dream, I took the bull by the horns, and I did it.  In the process, I've met other women like myself who are not afraid to hitch up, tow, and go.   Let me tell you, when I am in my camper with my camera and my little dog, I am the happiest person on earth.

I have a beautiful family and a loving husband who support my craziness.

That helps.  I have a business that I can be away from

for up to two weeks at a time. That helps. 

  

Last year I turned 50 years old and I'm finding that

life is just beginning for me; that this is perhaps

the best time of my life.  I'm dangerous. 

Hello Kitty.  Do I need it?                                                                                                Me, 50? -- but wasn't it just yesterday America celebrated it's Bi-Centennial (1976) Remember the Quarter?

   

Daddy really hates my outfits.

Being present, to enjoy and photograph a day like this one makes me happy.

  

     I drive, she runs, I take cell picture.

At 20 -  Newlywed Photo, fishing on the    Michigamme Reservoir in Crystal Falls, MI

  

Now, I'm my own captain                                  and my own fish picture taker!

 

Dangerous because I'm free to examine what it is in life that I truly love to do, what makes me smile inside.                        I feel like a butterfly.

I'm giving myself permission to be a new me, not a wife, a mother, or an end product of other people's expectations. An original.

I keep coming back to doing things that I loved doing as a child, to reliving those memories my way, now.   So, off I go, the Hen House and me....fishing, camping and exploring with Remi, who rides shotgun.  I physically feel strong enough to dare and I'm  brave enough to not give a rip about convention. When I'm rolling down the road with the radio blasting some Miranda Lambert, seeing the dog's ears are flapping in the breeze, and sipping on a cold Diet Coke from the console, I'm dangerous.

My camera, my friend.

Thistle.  A weed?

I've been a good girl. I've done my time.  I don't regret any of it.  I raised my family which includes folding a stack of clothes to rival the height of the Sears Tower...I still call it that:  the Sears Tower. I sped through town in the mini van that overflowed with sports gear, forgotten food, and strange smells.  I volunteered at school, attended every parent-teacher event and ball game x three.  I've mastered the art of boo-boo kissing, story telling, and hamburger camouflage.  I miss it all. I can't have it back.

Fast forward to ebay.com

on another stormy winter's night

November, 2010, at 1 a.m.  

AIRSTREAM TRAILER 2008 DESIGN WITHIN REACH, Low Miles.  Did it matter that this trailer was situated in New York City, 700 miles from my home?  Nooooooo.    Did it matter that my husband had no idea what I was cooking up?  Noooooooo.  I was on a mission.  The lyrics to Eminem's Lose Yourself kept rolling in my head.                                                                                                        "Look, if you had one shot, or one opportunity

To seize everything you ever wanted in one moment
Would you capture it or just let it slip?
Yo"

Since that fateful night my life has changed. I have my husband to thank for it.  The man puts up with a lot (of shenannigans).

I've become my own entertainment system.  Just the other day I saw an ad for the International Colt Starting championships in Tennessee.  Why not?  I love cowboys and horses.  Then I read about a Baron Von Steuben's burial site in New York.  I love this man. Why not?   Now I've just got to remember to reload my Open Road Tolling thingie.